Do you like hip-hop music? That was the question that I was asked out of the blue while I was waiting on a BART train today. Just a random stranger asking me if I like hip hop music. Now I don't so I said "no," and the man wandered off. I don't know why he wanted to know this or what he was doing with the information. Maybe he was taking a survey. I don't know.
Then I went for a run today and this is what I overheard as I ran buy a couple, "I'm not saying it was the root cause just that is might have exacerbated it." I just loved that sentence and I don't have any idea what they were talking about.
There are two things I want to write about. I'll start with my brother. He had a cat scan last week and he got the results today when he went in for his next round of chemo. The cat scan showed that the tumors had not grown since he began this new round. They haven't shrunk but they haven't grown. It's interesting how normal can change. We are now working with a new normal. Now news that isn't bad news is good news. He will continue this chemo treatment for the next two months. Then the doctor is looking into an experimental treatment that might help my brother. So for now we continue to wait. But on a day when we didn't receive bad news we are just being grateful.
The other things is this. I saw a movie today which wasn't great. It wasn't The Nanny Diaries or Transformers but still it wasn't good. (Feast of Love.) But there was a trailer before the movie. It is a Tyler Perry movie. He is the one who made Diary of a Mad Black Woman and Madea's Family Reunion. I didn't care for DOMBW but I loved the character Madea. Today's trailer looked terrible. It's called Why Did We Get Married. It is also starring Janet Jackson. But here is the question that I'm pondering. It is an entirely African American cast. So I wander do I think the movie is really bad or is it racism? I grew up in the south. I know that I have a history of racism in my family and where I grew up. The town I grew up in was segregated. There was a part of town that was referred to as the quarters and that is where all the African Americans in our town lived. And I knew that there was an unspoken word that went before quarters. I say unspoken but it wasn't always unspoken. There was a "quarters" in most of the towns near where I grew up. We used to drive through one on our way to high school. One day my brother was driving and we had an accident. So I had to go into someone's house and call for help. I called my Dad and was trying to tell him where we were. Since I didn't know what the name of the road was I just had to try and describe to him where we were. But I knew that I couldnt' tell him that I was in the quarters, not while I was standing in this woman's house. I just don't know. My racism really scares me, because I'm just not sure how aware of it I am. I guess I am more aware of it than most. But I just don't know if I'll ever escape it. I don't think I treat peopel differently or view them differently because of their race. But is that enough? I don't know.
And is this why I don't like hip hop and rap music?
Well there you have it: that is my personal confession for today. I don't need absolution. I don't think.
Peace out!
1 comment:
I'm glad to hear about your brother's lack of change. I hope the new normal hangs on for a while, and the experimental treatment is helpful.
Lord, hear our prayers.
As for your racism issue, join the club. I think most of us melanin-challenged folks with a collective unconscious history of slavery and imperialism have it deeply embedded. But you're absolutely right, that doesn't absolve us from working to root it out, developing some heterogeneous relationships, and working for structural change.
That said, I think the hip-hop and Tyler Perry issue is different. I don't think that aesthetics of necessity signify racism. I don't ever want to see any of the Air Bud movies, but I still love Golden Retrievers.
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